Gobble, Gobble (aka What I Did This Loooong Holiday Weekend) pt. II: More goofing around, and such.

The weekend, continued:

Saturday:
We, stupidly, went to Fry's Electronics in an attempt to spend a 'lil quality time with Pops, but it turned out to be a test in patience and German engineering.

The parking lot was a mind-fuck; it took 10+ minutes to get into the lot, but it turned out THERE WAS A LOT OF OPEN SPACES. Mind. FUCK.

Plus, we didn't really buy anything, except for AA batts and a couple of Air Dusters (nots for huffing, just for cleaning).

To make up for Fry's ass-facey-ness, Jaya and I made fools of ourselves in the (not even full, stupid) parking lot:

It looks like I'm trying to do my best impression of Sasquatch. GRRRRROWR.

9342394809238426th take. Knees were a'cracklin'.

HAHAHAHAH my favorite! She looks like a marionette puppet.

Reach for the STARS!

SUNDAY:

I think I watched the entire 2nd season of Stormchasers on Discovery and YES.  I love youse CRAZAZZZIE tornadoes, lightning storms, and turtle probes (mmm... that sounds creepy out of context).

I.

WAS.

GLUED.

I, in one point in my life, want to have the face-melting honor of seeing (in person), and then describing, a tornado as "beautiful/gorgeous," just like the crazy dudes of Stormchasers. I think that I was soooo taken in because it's almost December here in L.A. and it's, like, 80+ degrees outside. On Saturday, there was a high of 84 degrees! IN DECEMBER.

Plus, we eat some sushi over at Little Tokyo.

Anyway, ENJOY these pictures of the natural phenomenon that has captured my wind-strewn heart:

Images of "GOD'S FINGER" via Google.

A Good Read: "The Thin Man."

I finished Dashiell Hammett's The Thin Man and it was fun and easy read.

I bought the book at the Melrose Trading Post/Fairfax Flea Market because of two things:
01\ I came to love noir detective fiction in college and
02\ The artwork on the cover is AWESOME.

The cover art seems contradictory to the story and the time period (set in the 1930s), but that's what makes it interesting and attractive.

Plus, that thin man image on the cover IS DASHIELL HAMMETT HIMSELF. Whaaaaaa? Cool.

I like how literal the cover is, as well. The Thin Man title + a thin man image = no room for error.

Cover photograph of Dashiell Hammett as the thin man by Azarnick; who did the cover art is unknown.

If you remember and loved Hart to Hart, then you'll like this (just add more booze and professionalism, but a lot less $$).

Love you, Nick and Nora Charles.

"My name is Kaya. I'm from Los Angeles and I'm a ROCKAHOLIC."

OHHHH 98.7! You make me want to slit my wrist for saying that into a tape recorder! And dangle, I didn't think of until later, but I USED MY REAL-ISH NAME. I should have screamed into the mic, "MY NAME IS GIANT SCREAMER! AHHHHHH!" Me embarrassing myself on tape came about the other night when I found myself with the delightful honor of seeing Band of Skulls at a private session @ the Slot Studios of 98.7fm. Star 98.7fm. They're still around? I guess. The band was shy and quiet when the asinine DJ host and fans ("yah! you guys rock! sweet! uh huh!") asked questions, . Since I knew I had to pay for parking ($11 fucking 25), I made my friend take a picture with me after they finished their set. I normally wouldn't do shit like this, but they were offering and I needed to get my $11.25-worth of fun. Enjoy some of the most awkward pictures I've taken in awhile:

Lady bassist, Blonde guitartis, and Sweaty drummer guy. I should look up their names.

Third camera's a charm? NOPE. The only moment of brevity was when the photographer whipped out the 3rd camera (mine and the photographer's was #1 & 2; #3 was my friend's) and the drummer turned to me and asked, "How many cameras did you guys bring? Hahhaha!" I responded with, "We brought a handful." The only better facial expression I had that day. WHAT AN AWKWARD PICTURE. They weren't as disinterested as they look. I enjoy what I wore that day. It's, like, I tried. Thanks, Jaya, for providing the clothes.

-- Funny moment (at least to me?):

Terrible DJ: How did you guys find out that you were doing the New Moon soundtrack? Guitarist guy: We saw it in the L.A. Times the other day? We don't know. They liked the song so we sent it to them.

"Hell is behind that door! You're going to meet death now... the LIVING DEAD!"

Several years ago when I saw Suspiria in the "Horror Films" section at Blockbuster, I debated with myself whether I should rent it or not. It looked soooooo coooooool sitting there rack but I didn't know anything about it and I didn't want to waste the precious $3.50 sitting in my pocket. So I left it. I probably rented some other sad-sack horror movie (Uzumaki, anybody? Anybody? No? Confusion doesn't equal scary... and neither do spirals) and didn't think about for years. HIGH FIVE TO ME because I finally rented it! High five! Elbow five! And. I. LOVED. IT. I forgive Dario Argento for making the soft-core porn terribleness that was Jenifer (she was the true meaning of "butter face"). But I'm not gonna lie- I don't think I fully understood what happened in the end? Maybe? Upward inflection? But that doesn't matter because it is visually stunning and I do believe I gasped (in horror, nonetheless) during each murder scene. Death by hanging, via skylight? Brutal. Death by barbed wire entanglement? NEW NIGHTMARE. Here are the shitty pictures I took of my t.v. screen. If you squint reaaallly closely, you can see images from the movie:

What is HAPPENING here?! I could live in this hallway/foyer.

It's a pinkish/mauve colored room with Escher-like birds painted on the walls and art deco-styled windows. And a huge urn, natch.

Ummm, YES. Yes to everything in this room.

I had to stitch this together (likes my skillz? hahahah ohhhh).

Again, YES TO EVERYTHING IN THIS ROOM.

I would live in this movie if I didn't think I'd die in some horrible fashion.

Feelin' Kinda Hinky + Under the Covers October Mixtapes, pt. II. (Plus alittle monkey action)

Here are the mixtapes that I sent out to my [The Monthly Mixtape] buddy. I've been enjoying my Halloween mixtape because it's the first one I've ever made and I ACTUALLY used songs/bands that I rarely listened to before now (i.e. Slint, The Crucifucks). ::10.09 Mixtape: Feelin' Kinda Hinky:: 01/ Devil Town (Daniel Johnston Cover): Noah and the Whale 02/ Goo Goo Muck: The Cramps 03/ Down To Rest: O'Death 04/ Sweet Pot: The Redneck Manifesto 05/ Halloween: Siouxsie and the Banshees 06/ We Share Our Mother's Health: The Knife 07/ Sewn Back: Dethklok 08/ California Uber Alles: Dead Kennedys 09/ Nosferatu Man: Slint 10/ You Give Me The Creeps: The Crucifucks 11/ Freaks Come Out At Night: Whodini 12/ Hang You From The Heavens: The Dead Weather 13/ You'll Find A Way (Switch & Graeme Sinden Remix): Santogold 14/ Thriller (Michael Jackson Cover): Kidz Bop Kids 15/ Guess I'll Forget You: The Black Heart Procession 16/ Killer Klowns From Outer Space: The Dickies ::10.09 Mixtape pt. II: Under The Covers:: 01/ Banquet: Slowbear The Great 02/ Careless Whisper: The Gossip 03/ No Diggity: The Klaxons 04/ The Great Escape: Dan Plus Add 05/ You Can Call Me Al: Hot Club De Paris 06/ Knife: Born Ruffians 07/ Choir Vandals: Ben Gibbard 08/ Heartbeats: Jose Gonzalez 09/ Forever Young: Youth Group 10/ Skulls: The Lemonheads 11/ House of the Rising Sun: Nina Simone 12/ Wild Is The Wind: Cat Power 13/ Speak To Me/Breathe: The Shins 14/ Boys Don't Cry: Japanther 15/ You're So Vain: Faster Pussycat 16/ Hoppipolla: We Are Scientists 17/ Over and Over: The Miserable Rich **A LITTLE EXTRA: Monkey Shines Thank you, George A. Romero, for making a movie about inappropriate monkey love. I forgot to write down the full quote (AHHHHH! IT WAS FUNNY AND AWESOME!) but the main character, Allan the quadriplegic (played by an overemotional Jason Beghe), looks down to Ella, his murder-crazed helper monkey, and says, "Go ahead and try something, fuck face." I laughed and laughed and rewounded it, like, five times. Who calls a monkey "fuck face" and means it? I do now.

I wish I could find a still of Ella the monkey stealing a neck hug! Question: Can you birth a murder monkey from your spine? Answer: Yes, especially after you've bitten it and shook it to death. All pictures found on Google Images

"Looks like he eats babies.... babies of rock 'n roll singers."

A couple of years ago, I bought this zombie-laden DVD movie trio titled, "The Undead Rising." It includes Revolt of the Zombies, Night Of The Living Dead, AND HARD ROCK ZOMBIES. It wasn't until the other night that I finally got to watching the last movie. I can't even describe in my own words the... awesome horribleness?... of this movie. So, here's the description on the back cover:

When Cassie meets Jesse and his friends backstage, she warns them to stop their concert plans in Grand Guignol. The band takes it in stride but seeks refuge from the town's angry parents at a strange mansion. While rehearsing in the mansion's private gardens, they are all brutally killed by a sadistic family of freaks led by ADOLPH HITLER. Hitler comes out of hiding, and with a mysterious pieces of music, Cassie raises the band from the dead to stop Hitler by rocking one final time.

Is that what happened? I can't remember because I was waiting with bated breath for the return of HITLER. That's right: HITLER. Hitler, zombies, LPs, angry mobs, an badass cop with exposed chest hair, big hair, bomb songs, band montages, nudie lady showering, an underage love interest, and Eva Braun-werewolf style . All the makings of a A+++++ movie. **BEST QUOTE EVER: Dudemate #1 (looking at Hitler): What about him? Jesse: Beats the shit out of me. Looks like he eats babies.... babies of rock 'n roll singers.

"They came from the grave to rock 'n roll and MISBEHAVE." Sexy.

Big hair and zombification on left. Underage lust on right.

Pictures from Google Images.

**A LITTLE EXTRA (Kaya in REAL LIFE): My Dad (watching T.V.): Kaya! Come look at these shoes! Me (sauntering over to the couch): What? My dad points to a girl wearing 5" platform Mary Jane wedges with added ankle strap AND STUDS ALL OVER the straps and trim: That's cute! Me (silently in my head): My dad knows me.

We're kind of a BIG DEAL (pt. II)

Actually, this one is all me. HOOOOOLLLLLLLLA at that. Back in 2005, I took a screenprinting class where I made tons of posters, stickers, posters, and more posters. Well, my teacher asked if she could use my outline of my building/trees/sun poster in the magazine/booklet that the Arts and Graphic Comm. department puts out every year. I said, "Of course! Go ahead!" I, unfortunately, wasn't able to get a copy of the booklet, so I wasn't able to see how she used my image UNTIL NOW. I'm giving the Internet a voluntary HIGH FIVE! and kudos because some sad sack scanned the ENTIRE MAGAZINE/BOOKLET and placed it online for me to find!! HOOLLLLLAAA x 58380934 Internet. Here it is:

Here is a scan of some of the screenprinted images.

Here is my hand-cut (what WHAT?!) keyline. I know: JEALOUS.

Shout out to "Anonymous"- we work well together.

If you're interested in community college-grade prose, poetry, and prints, here is the entire booklet called InScape in .pdf format.

We're kind of a BIG DEAL (pt. I)

I've done a HORRIBLE thing. I "googled" myself. MYSELF. VOOOMMMMMIIIITTTTTDAFJWOEJFD in my mouth; I know it's self-centered and HORRIBLE but I was tired of stalking all of my past and present (to use that word loosely) friends and classmates. Soooo, I decided to stalk myself and I was pleasantly surprised at what I found. When Jaya and I were 8 years old, our parents threw us a big party at the local park and for some reason the L.A. Times was there to cover a story on "Parks are Perfect Party Playgrounds". Being big-timers like us, we evidently "discussed the pros and cons of turning 8." Here is what we said:

The Tengco twins, though, ignored the noise as well as three wedding parties that gingerly picked their way past the picnic shelter in search of strategic photo spots. Instead, Jacqueline and Katherine--"Jaya" and "Kaya" to friends--kept an eye on the steadily growing pile of gifts and discussed the pros and cons of turning 8.

When she woke up that morning, Kaya said thoughtfully, "I felt the same--like I was 7."

But Jaya noticed a change immediately: "When I woke up, I felt like I was 8. I felt smarter and happier."

I, as usual, gave a terse answer. But Jaya, JAYA, got all kinds of sassy and self-aggrandizing with her "smarter and happier" quip. WITH THAT BEING SAID: Trip down (what is left of my) Memory Lane: It brought back the one memory I have of that party: A classmate WOULD NOT let up on the fact that the "Little Mermaid" entertainer/person who was performing at the party was wearing a watch. He kept on going on about how it was impossible to wear watches under the sea. I believe at one point he said, "You're not a real mermaid." Dr. Twinklettits: Smartass! Pickles, the drummer: Dude, no hitting. Here is the full article. OBLIGATORY PICTURE POST: Jaya and I cheek-to-cheek during our roadtrip up to Big Sur, CA back in May 2008. AWWWWWW! I know!

I LOOVES my bangs here and the foreshadowing of the blonde-ness of Jaya's to come.

The not-Bixby bridge (but just as beautiful).

Message RECEIVED.

Last week, I cracked open a fortune cookie and this is what it told me:

THANK YOU, Natalee Thai Restaurant.

I'M A BELIEVER! I'M A BELIEEEEEEVER!!!

I'm crossing off #s 1 & 2 off of my "Things I Need To DO" list and I'm packing my bags for Stockholm, Sweden!!

Or Helsinki, Finland! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really, whichever one will have me first. BOOM. Done and done. p.s. I should really try playing those numbers in the lottery.

Knee deep in the best crap we can buy.

Jaya and I are on this constant and manic quest to find new and different thrift stores. It's like an addiction that we have to feed and fuel every couple of weeks.

It can be exhausting, frustrating, exciting, or ridonculously MIND-BOTTLING. We can either come away from the experience with some great, if not interesting, goooodies, or just achy feet and smelly, grubby little hands.

However, sometimes amongst all the rubble and rough we find little gems and diamonds that make the hunt and gather alllll worth it (save for the smelly paws: ugggh + grody x 430924809 million). Here are some of the best things we have found in the past few weeks. ENJOY.

I'm getting closer and closer to my "porcelain" (aka REAL) "baby hands" dreams. BABY STUMPS!

---

Jaya found this very ADORABLE 45 LP holder. Some of the detailing is lost here, but there's embossings of cats playing flutes, windmills (HOLLA), princes, and rabbits in costumes.

---Mmmmmmmmm, DRAWERS. And yes, I do have enough pink, red, and purple pens to warrant (almost) individual compartments.

"Don't be a dick, be a DUDE!" The 101's jab to the jugular.

This past weekend, Jaya and I tried to make it out of the city to go up north for a impromptu daytrip.

OOHHHHHH the possibilities!!! Up to Gilroy for the Garlic Festival! Or to Santa Barbara for whatevs! Or to Solvang for aebleskivers! But the 101 was unrelenting and, after 2+ hrs. in my '96 Corolla (aka Cooper Nielsen), we only got as far as Camarillo and Oxnard. DAAMMMNNS YOUSE, FREEWAY, DAMMMNNNS YOUSE! I'm shaking BOTH OF MY FISTS at you! FISTS IN THE AIR! SHAKING LAZILY!!!!

All right.

Camarillo was a bit of a bust. We hit up the outlet stores but only came away with a bra and some chocolates (aside: J's boobs and my sweet tooth are in better shape). We did manage to find a tiny thrift store (called Thrift Store?) were we found an avocado green hardware drawer (with tiny comparments) that reminded me of this giant drawer we saw at the Fairfax Flea Market.

My "new" drawer v. one of my many, MANY dream drawers.

---

We then trucked on to Oxnard where we happened upon the Salsa Festival and another thrift store. We made a quick stop at the festival were stuffed our faces with tacos, macho nachos, and churros, but strangely enough, not that much salsa. A festival of LIES - joking, but I (I mean Jaya) ain't gonna pay $$ to taste "Salsas of the WORLD." Bogus.

At the "Mission Bargain Center Thrift Store," we had some gooood picture time and my car was a couple of lbs. heavier with the purchases of a wool coat and an olde-tyme Chinese whet stone.

PICCCTTTURE TIMMMMME!!

Paling around the Salsa Festival.

Picked up some salt water taffy.


Jaya spotted it blocks away from the festival. GOOOOD eye.

On left: What J came with; On middle & right: Goldilocks & the 3 Bears + Little Red Ridinghood. BOOOM.

Mama Bear with zazzzzy glasses.

Years of taking yearbook photos have taught me NOTHING.

Har har, AS ALWAYS.

"Once is a Coincidence, Twice is a Lifestyle."

I hate computers. Ehhhhhh, LIES. Actually, I'm scared of them. They're shysty. They're unruly. "It's not like regular hate. It's so much more black. If [it was] a street gang I'd fucking go to war with [it] with bottles and chains." It's that brutal. For eons and eons, computers, to me, were only good for writing papers, checking email, buying big lady shoes, and ignoring friends and acquaintances who've passed my "2 years are enough to get to know you" life rule. ANYWAY, a couple of months ago, with a "gentle" push from Jaya, I took a college course to learn some rudimentary InDesign/Photoshop/Illustrator skills, and to learn to get over my hatredy/fear of electroni-ie things. And so I'll stop asking Jaya to do computer-y things for me. My teacher told the class the only way to learn (and to continue learning) is to constantly fiddle around with the the programs and that is what I've been doing. HAHAHAHAHAH COMPUTER. I WIN THIS ROUND. So far, I've made the header for this thing (scroll allllll the way to the top) and this thing below for my Etsy shop:

Yes, yes. I like desaturated and muted colors. TheKMonstrosity is where I be selling somethings.

Well, the other day, Jaya sends me this fantastic picture by way of the Definatalie blog and I'm thinking, "Hmmmm, Did I forget what I was looking at BEFORE I made my header? Jebus, maybe! Nice work, lady."

By Natalie P. @ Definatalie. It IS a funny story.

This Natalie gal writes, however, how she was inspired by SOMEBODY ELSE. Woka woka. There ain't a person who hasn't copped this style. This one is by f_letter on Flickr.

Nicely said f_letter.

WITH THAT BEING SAID: On one of my last projects for my computer class I used Picasso's Guernica painting for a background, but I inverted the blacks and whites and fooled around with the size. My teacher fumbled around for a moment, trying to remember a quote. Finally, he looked at me and said, "I think it was Picasso who said something like, 'You're a genius if you can steal another artist's work.'" But then he shook his head saying, "Ignore me. I don't know what I'm talking about." I shrugged my shoulders at him and said, "I think you're calling me A GENIUS." Crickets in the room. I TOTALLLY KILLED IT.

I DO do (some kind of) WORK.

So, this is what I spend time doing: RE-RE-ARRANGING SONGS. It's alll types of fun. This is the playlist that I'm sending my mixtape buddies on Last.fm. Mixtape 07.09: Schweaty Messes Summer '09: 01 To Hell With Good Intentions: McLusky 02 O Shot: The Gay Blades 03 Light of the Morning: Band of Skulls 04 Sleepyhead: Passion Pit 05 Ghetto Love: Spinnerette 06 Teen Creep: No Age 07 Daylight: Matt & Kim 08 In For the Kill (Skream's Let's Get Ravey Remix): La Roux 09 It Get's Your Body Movin': Suckers 10 Skinny Love: Bon Iver 11 Some Things Last A Long Time: Daniel Johnston 12 Honest James: Thurston Moore 13 Cold Fame: Band of Skulls 14 The Wolves (Bon Iver Cover Song): Ellie Goulding 15 The Dillion Family Dancers: The Red Neck Manifesto OBLIGATORY PICTURE POST SO I DON'TS FORGETS (this is some kind of crude memory-jogging therapy):

It do, it do. Saw this at the PCC Flea Market back in 11.06. Time traveling!

Just Another Playlist.

This mixtape was sent to me by landmarcattack via The Monthly Mixtape on Last.fm. It is eclectic and strange; the first mixtape (yep yep it's a twofer!) is a bit 90s/college rock-ish, while the latter is screamo/emo/punk rock. What the what, am I right? Here's the list: Mixtape #1: Crybaby Pussyfaces 1) Br00tal – Drag The River 2) How To Live Here – Good Luck 3) Mess Me Up – Nobunny 4) Titus Andronicus – Titus Andronicus 5) Darwin Was A Baptist – Ninja Gun 6) Fire On Peshtigo – O’Death 7) Kingdom of Ice – Woven Hand 8) The Gardner – The Tallest Man On Earth 9) Black Pear Tree – The Mountain Goats & Kaki King 10) Sin – Chuck Ragan & Austin Lucas 11) Motivational Song – Algernon Cadwallader 12) Teenage Timebomb – The Okmoniks 13) Small Talk (blah blah blah) – The Max Levine Ensemble 14) Night Owls – Bridge And Tunnel 15) The Minimum Wage Song – This Bike Is A Pipe Bomb 16) Jus’ Folks – The Bananas 17) Say I Won’t (Recognize) – The Gaslight Anthem 18) Summer Grof – The Spinto Band 19) Toadvine – Ben Nichols 20) The Purgatory Line – Drive-By Truckers 21) Guilt: The Song – Andrew Jackson Jihad 22) Infamous Apology – Halo Fauna 23) Motion in the Ocean – Nana Grizol Mixtape #2: Meathead Doodbrahs 1) Trilogy 3 (Fall Days) – Loma Prieta 2) Letter of Resignation – Transistor Transistor 3) Awaken – Racebannon 4) The Shape of Punk that Never Came – United Nations 5) Dropping Cylinders – Mouthbreather 6) Retro Abortion – Double Negative 7) A. News Rips Through The Community – Jason Crumer 8) (My Head) – Times new Viking 9) Self Checkout – Off With Their Heads 10) I hate myself but I don’t want to die – Down In the Dumps 11) Lost – Jonesin’ 12) Fair Well – Young Livers 13) A Place To Die – Osceola 14) For Medications Only – Trainwreck 15) Speed of the Nail – Torche 16) I Hope The Ghosts Of the Dead Haunt Yr Soul Forever –Valient Thorr 17) Chapter 2, 3 – Verse 18) 体脂肪と戦う - Killie 19) Hounds – Cruel Hand 20) Not Your Choice – Wetnurse 21) Germ Freak (I Ain’t No) – Annihilation Time 22) Gotta Get The Gist – Shorebirds 23) Bridge above the Water – Ghostlimb And because every GOOD post should be accompanied by pictures, here are a couple of photos from a daytrip Jaya and I took to Solvang , CA (the home of wooden toys, craz-zaizie white folk, and ableskevers) back in the summer of 2007.

This place is the reason I LOVELOVELVEO windmills and turbine energy.

Ohhhh, an OG Pancake "Haus".

It pays not to plan ahead.

With Jaya, it seems like we rarely get to where we're trying to "get" to. EFFFFS TO YOU, beach. I didn't want to tan my chesties anyway. Instead, we managed to find the Alpine Village Swap Meet off the 91 fwy and we each spent a $1 to basically sweat like baby piggies in a blanket.

"Repeat-er Disease": It should really be recognized by the AMA. Yarp. Oooohhhhh double dang!

As much as I hatesss bikers/bicyclists on the road (DREAM: to clip a indie-looking hipster on the elbow on York Blvd. GENTRIFICATION! Fist shaking in the air!!), I LOVELOVELOVE the 90s and this bike is screaming, "Coolness." THANK YOU Parker Lewis.

Jaya is trying to fill the navajo-inspired-pouch-necklace-sized hole that's been haunting her DREAMS. Woka woka!

--- After losing 9042399 lbs. in sweat, we moved on to the Memory Lanes Thrift Store Mall in Torrance where we made out like BANDITS. But not really. Somebody bust out the world's tiniest violin for the following items that we, regrettably, didn't buy (but we were self-hating enough to taking pictures of). BOOM.

A deer-with-antlers brass goblet. SLAMMIN', but not for $160. At that price, I better be drinking gold.

In my mind, Jaya had to be jealous (JEALOUS.) of this eskmino doll's dreamy hirsute jacket (with matching pant).

Collectively, the two of us have amassed enough "funny" mugs to, I don't know, feed a small nation? I'm a little low on "I own too many mugs" jokes, so allls I'm gonna says is, "I'm good."

The best red jacket that she will NEVER buy.