From Japan + FREE = Everything That Is Right In This World

My co-worker's wife just came back from an extended trip in Japan and like any right-thinking woman brought back a sack load of random cosmetics. Since I was surrounded by dudes who don't know the difference between lipgloss and lip stain and sit next to a boss lady who doesn't wear a stitch of makeup, I had to suppress the low guttural OOOOHHHMYGOOOD that I usually reserve for utter disbelief/pee pants moments.

I swear I have better computer skills. Just, uh, not today. From top left: Shu Uemura Glow On in Pink 34 // Kesalan Patharan Aqua Lip Carat in S011 // Estée Lauder Idealist // Ettusais Separate Masacara (Perfect) // YSL Sheer Lipstick in No.33 // Paul&Joe Mascara Duo N

Honestly, I don't know what half this crap is. BUT. Ya, know... IT'S STUFF TO PUT ON MY FACE! MY FAAAAACE! Unfortunately, I don't possess the sweet alabaster skin of an anime character but that won't stop me from trying. Surprisingly enough, the YSL lipstick looks pretty slammin' on despite being the color of dried blood in the tube (and it taste like Jolly Ranchers? Or is that a sign that my days are numbered? Whatever). The Shu Uemura blush makes me look like I drove through an icy snow storm which instantaneously drained all the color from my face, but I kind of like it. It's like I have surprisingly rosy cheeks for an undead person. As for everything else -- who knows. I haven't tried it yet because my face is already bruised from all the washing.

Gobble, Gobble (aka What I Did This Loooong Holiday Weekend) pt. I

I ate.

I baked.

I slept.

I pal-ed around with the family.

I watched A LOT of StormChasers on the Discovery Channel (NO JOKE. I forced Jaya to watch, like, 8+ hrs of Reed Timmer, Tim Samarias, and Sean Casey literally chase storms and tornadoes all over Middle America. Yes yes, it IS FASCINATING. I see you rollllling your eyes. DON'T JUDGE ME.).

DON'TS BELIEVE ME?! Here's some pictures and commentary to back up my story.

THURSDAY: Gobble Gobble Day.
For Thanksgiving dinner, J and I baked and baked, and then screwed up, and then baked some more. We ate the final products before we could take pictures, but we made a few things:
01/ Graham-cracker crust cheesecakes.
02/ Oreo-crusted cheesecakes.
03/ Graham cracker/Oreo crusted mousse pies/
04/ Chocolate mousse-filled napoleon-ish desserts with raspberries, blueberries, and blackberries.
05/ Bread.

Here is the delicious spread cooked mostly by my aunt. Thanks a'plenty!

Usually, I can bake a French loaf of bread like nobody's business, but I couldn't DO IT this Thanksgiving! Dannnngle! So here's is a picture of a better loaf from better time, a better place.

 

Here is what I wore (which is me, basically, wearing my favorite denim jacket and my favorite floral skirt. BIG SURPRISE) and me acting likes a goofsball!:

 

I scream for florals and brown shoes!

FRIDAY: Dad's Birthday! Many, many happy returns, DAD!

Soooo, the following day, there was even more eating and merry-making to be had because it was me dad's birthday! Jaya and I got him this amazing thing, as well as this Sans Rival cake (look it up- it's DIABOLICAL).

Here is the cake, after cut, before face-stuffing:

  At one point, it did say, "Happy Birthday DAD."

Just Another Mixtape: November Issue

Hhhhhhoooohhhhh... almost forgot this post. Woka woka.

Be entertained with this while I catch up on my weekend/Thanksgiving post(s).
--
This month's mixtape tape theme over at [The Monthly Mixtape] was "1, 2, 3, 4"- meaning first song had to be one minute long, second song would be two minutes, and so on and so forth. Only catch: the playlist can only be 10 minutes long.

Coooool, cool. I decided to be a team player and I played by the rules (YOU CANNOT BOX ME IN!) and the theme. Here is what I came up with (I really tried hard not to make the last few songs completely instrumental and I think I did alll right):

This is what I sent to my pard'ner, witchywoman.
::11.09 Mixtape:: One, Two, Three, and More::
01/ Moments With Oliver: Rachel Yamagata
02/ Teenage Timebomb: The Okmoniks
03/ Tessellate: Toyko Police Club
04/ Jailbreak: Thin Lizzy
05/ "En Gallop": Joanna Newsom
06/ Sunflower River Blue: John Fahey
07/ Sometime Later: Alpha
08/ Lament For The Aurochs: The Sword
09/ Into Dust (Mazzy Star Cover): Ashtar Command
10/ The Only Moment We Were Alone: Explosions In The Sky

And here is the playlist that she sent to me:

01/ Our Spring Is Sweet Not Fleeting: Of Montreal
02/ The King of Carrot Flowers Pt. 1: Neutral Milk Hotel
03/ The Songs That We Sing: Charlotte Gainsbourg
04/ Sing, Theresa Says: Greg Laswell
05/ April Fools: Rufus Wainwright
06/ No Cars Go: The Arcade Fire
07/ Delilah: The Dresden Dolls
08/ Gerdur: Sigur Ros
09/ Old Whore's Diet: Rufus Wainwright
10/ Light: Ben Lee

**OBLIGATORY PICTURE POST:

Jaya got me this t-shirt:

While she's rocking this one almost everyday:

Hahahahaha! How contradictory. Snag them from Print Liberation.

What a WEEKEND! pt. II: 90s plaid, the Metro, and Little Tokyo.

Daaaannnnngle, I've, kinda maybe already, forgotten the events of this past weekend (save for Dethklok). There was some shopping somewhere, me butching it up in a plaid jacket, the Metro, and Little Toyko.

I have to refer back to the pictures that my sister and I took... ohhhh okay! The series of events is coming back to me! WHHHHHAAAT.

SATURDAY:
Jaya was on a mission to find an outfit for her Christmas party, and, so far, she only had a pair of 5" wedge platforms to work off of. So, we hit the Salvation Army and Aaardvarks in Pasadena. Why thrifts stores/vintages shops? Jaya says that "she doesn't feel right in new clothes," which roughly translates to, "I WILL WRECK anything vaguely new. Not on purpose. But you know."

The Salvation Army was a bust/find! Bust: nothing to wear for J's party; Find: a floral/white bathing suit and a very 90s floral/grey henley for this lady. I have to remind myself to take pictures of both. PICTURES PICTURES PICTURES. Alll right, stored that in the memory bank. Boooosh.

Aaardvark's was a high-five for J because she managed to find a dress/skirt. HIGH FIVE! I wished we had taken a picture of the whole thing, alas we butchered the shirt part of the dress (which is fine by me because I was getting some serious "sad art teacher living in Georgia O'Keeffe haze" vibe from it) .There's no use in describing it now because her whole outfit looks better in person/picture form.

Okay, too much rambling, not enough pictorial distractions. Here is what I wore.

I got that wonderfully 90s plaid hoodie from the Salvation Army. It's oooold Quiksilver and soft to the touch.

Still trying to perfect my facial posing. Getting a wee bit better.

Jaya looked at me while we were walking and said, "You should get Zachary Ty Bryan's haircut. You know the one" and then she makes a "shaving the back of your head motion." (I wish I could find a picture of his terribly awesome haircut! Ayyyy, just go watch early episodes of Home Improvement and you'll see what I'm talking about).

I THINK she's trying to tell me to just take my 90s era adoration to the next, if not ultimate, level. WE'LL SEE JAYA.

Sunday:
Last week, the Gold Line on the Metro extended it's stops beyond the Union Station so we decided to venture out to Little Tokyo.

However, we almost didn't make it there because of my horrible experience of installing a new modem/router at the house. It was painful, long, and made me want to slit my wrists.

Anyway, Little Tokyo was funn-er than anticipated (that morning's internet debacle was SOUL CRUSHING). I tried on a sequined onesie and tight (both literally & figuratively) tortoise-ish sunglasses at some new store (name: maybe Kimski? Kimki?); ate some decent shabu shabu at Shabu Shabuyo; and lastly, got some of my favorite Japanese treats from the local Japanese market, Nijiya Market.

Picture montage time!

 

Some of the sweetest and best tasting treats EVER TO BE MADE BY MAN. Thank you, Japanese food makers.

Oh my jebus, I'm tiring of typing. Later.

What a WEEKEND! pt. I: DETHKLOK + MASTODON @ Hollywood Palladium.

Jaya and I went to see one of the MOST BLACKEST AND BRUTAL-EST SHOWS OF ALL TIME: Mastodon and Dethklok played a show at the Hollywood Palladium on the 20th and it was ridiculous fun.

Firstly, metal shows aren't REALLY my scene. I like wearing black as much as the next indie/hipster/bougie/douchebag, but apparently not as much as metal fans. Metal fans have a grrrreat aesthetic- long scraggly hair, tight black jeans, worn-in t-shirt, chains a'plenty, and denim jackets all around.

Secondly, I didn't really care for Mastodon (why? because any encore that feels longer than the actually set is TOOOO MUCH) but the graphics that played on the screen behind them during their set was all kinds of messed up freaky:  B+W video of an old man dying with galactical images superimposed; animation of dying horses and whales.

I can't really emote how much I LOVED seeing Dethklok/Brendon Smalls on stage so PICTURE MONTAGE TIME!

Mastodon on stage.

Mastodon on stage.

 

Waiting for Dethklok to get on stage.

Senator Stampingston: Gentlemen, it's clear that we're in a universally precarious situation. Dethklok has summoned a troll.    
General Crozier: That's impossible, there's no such thing as trolls. 

Senator Stampingston: Then how do you explain the dead unicorns?

 

 DETHKLOK! DETHKLOK! DETHKLOK! Dethklok takes stage.

A mosh pit was forming to the right of us, like a gale-force wind hurricane.

 Someone loves Nathan Explosion! The hoodie of the dude standing in front of me.

As the show ends, the crowd is getting into full METAL MODE: rock hands out! I didn't participate because I don't think my hands would let me.

Always famished after a good show; Jaya's plate @ Norm's.

Here are some of my all-time favorite quotes from one of the funnniest shows on television: Metalocalypse. Make sure when you're reading them that you're wearing adult diapers because you'll be peeing in your pants.

Senator Stampingston: Gentlemen, it's clear that we're in a universally precarious situation. Dethklok has summoned a troll.

General Crozier: That's impossible, there's no such thing as trolls.

Senator Stampingston: Then how do you explain the dead unicorns?

--

Nathan: Well hey bodybag! How's it going? [impersonating bodybag] Smells like somebody took a crap in here! [normal voice] Ohh, bodybag! Well, look bodybag, it's your old friends Brains! [holds up a brain with flies around it, an elderly person gets ready to vomit] [Nathan impersonating brain] Hey idiot! I'm Brains, I go in your head. [The elderly person vomits]

--

Nathan: Do it again, Toki. Take 164.

Skwisgaar: Just... let me record it. Each take gets worse! He's slowly learning how to unplay the guitar.

Toki Wartooth: I can hear that. The talkback mike is on.

Skwisgaar: Pickle, please let me know when the talkback mike is on so that Mr. Sensitives don'ts goes to crysbabies house for vacation?

Toki: I can stills hear you.

Skwisgaar: So, what do you want? A be-able-to-hear-things award?!

Toki: Eh, not really. Doesn't sound like a greats award, to be honest.

--

Nathan: And now, the blackest present for the most brutal of all bass players... [the gift box falls open, empty] ... NOOOOTHING!

Murderface: Oh, you suck! You all suck!

Nathan: Awwww, what's wrong?

Skwisgaar: Ah yeah, go play records backwards and kill yourself.

Pickles: Hey fatso! We got your favorite thing: disappointment!

A Good Read: "The Thin Man."

I finished Dashiell Hammett's The Thin Man and it was fun and easy read.

I bought the book at the Melrose Trading Post/Fairfax Flea Market because of two things:
01\ I came to love noir detective fiction in college and
02\ The artwork on the cover is AWESOME.

The cover art seems contradictory to the story and the time period (set in the 1930s), but that's what makes it interesting and attractive.

Plus, that thin man image on the cover IS DASHIELL HAMMETT HIMSELF. Whaaaaaa? Cool.

I like how literal the cover is, as well. The Thin Man title + a thin man image = no room for error.

Cover photograph of Dashiell Hammett as the thin man by Azarnick; who did the cover art is unknown.

If you remember and loved Hart to Hart, then you'll like this (just add more booze and professionalism, but a lot less $$).

Love you, Nick and Nora Charles.

"You mean I get to destroy United States history... LITERALLY!? [sheds a tear of blood]!" (aka HAPPY BIRTHDAY!)

It's birthday time! Here is the horoscope from the L.A. Times for those born on the most fabulous day, November 10th.:

You will go into this new era with a light heart, realizing that some of the things you used to fret about are just not important in your current incarnation. Vows of love will be exchanged in December. Your career gets on the fast track in March. You'll see many new places between June and your next birthday. Aquarius and Virgo people adore you. Lucky numbers are 2, 5, 40, 11, and 18.

Not bad, not bad. -- This is my favorite birthday quote EVER:

Nathan: And now, the blackest present for the most brutal of all bass players... [the gift box falls open, empty] ... NOOOOTHING!

Murderface: Oh, you suck! You all suck!

Nathan: Awwww, what's wrong?

Skwisgaar: Ah yeah, go play records backwards and kill yourself.

Pickles: Hey fatso! We got your favorite thing: disappointment!

-- And here is a favorite picture of myself and my sister:

"My name is Kaya. I'm from Los Angeles and I'm a ROCKAHOLIC."

OHHHH 98.7! You make me want to slit my wrist for saying that into a tape recorder! And dangle, I didn't think of until later, but I USED MY REAL-ISH NAME. I should have screamed into the mic, "MY NAME IS GIANT SCREAMER! AHHHHHH!" Me embarrassing myself on tape came about the other night when I found myself with the delightful honor of seeing Band of Skulls at a private session @ the Slot Studios of 98.7fm. Star 98.7fm. They're still around? I guess. The band was shy and quiet when the asinine DJ host and fans ("yah! you guys rock! sweet! uh huh!") asked questions, . Since I knew I had to pay for parking ($11 fucking 25), I made my friend take a picture with me after they finished their set. I normally wouldn't do shit like this, but they were offering and I needed to get my $11.25-worth of fun. Enjoy some of the most awkward pictures I've taken in awhile:

Lady bassist, Blonde guitartis, and Sweaty drummer guy. I should look up their names.

Third camera's a charm? NOPE. The only moment of brevity was when the photographer whipped out the 3rd camera (mine and the photographer's was #1 & 2; #3 was my friend's) and the drummer turned to me and asked, "How many cameras did you guys bring? Hahhaha!" I responded with, "We brought a handful." The only better facial expression I had that day. WHAT AN AWKWARD PICTURE. They weren't as disinterested as they look. I enjoy what I wore that day. It's, like, I tried. Thanks, Jaya, for providing the clothes.

-- Funny moment (at least to me?):

Terrible DJ: How did you guys find out that you were doing the New Moon soundtrack? Guitarist guy: We saw it in the L.A. Times the other day? We don't know. They liked the song so we sent it to them.

Is It weird to be obsessed with a fictional bear? DON'T ANSWER THAT.

Smokey the bear. OMG, you are the best. Now I'm on a mad hunt for all things Smokey and will probably spend the rest of my life time cruelly setting myself up for disappointment and misery (again. sadface!) because I know that I will never find exactly what I'm looking for.

all found via google

Wait? What was that US government? YOU SELL THESE MOST FANTASTIC POSTERS (except the first one. The one I want the most, natch)?!?!?! You slay/Bobby Flay me.

"Hell is behind that door! You're going to meet death now... the LIVING DEAD!"

Several years ago when I saw Suspiria in the "Horror Films" section at Blockbuster, I debated with myself whether I should rent it or not. It looked soooooo coooooool sitting there rack but I didn't know anything about it and I didn't want to waste the precious $3.50 sitting in my pocket. So I left it. I probably rented some other sad-sack horror movie (Uzumaki, anybody? Anybody? No? Confusion doesn't equal scary... and neither do spirals) and didn't think about for years. HIGH FIVE TO ME because I finally rented it! High five! Elbow five! And. I. LOVED. IT. I forgive Dario Argento for making the soft-core porn terribleness that was Jenifer (she was the true meaning of "butter face"). But I'm not gonna lie- I don't think I fully understood what happened in the end? Maybe? Upward inflection? But that doesn't matter because it is visually stunning and I do believe I gasped (in horror, nonetheless) during each murder scene. Death by hanging, via skylight? Brutal. Death by barbed wire entanglement? NEW NIGHTMARE. Here are the shitty pictures I took of my t.v. screen. If you squint reaaallly closely, you can see images from the movie:

What is HAPPENING here?! I could live in this hallway/foyer.

It's a pinkish/mauve colored room with Escher-like birds painted on the walls and art deco-styled windows. And a huge urn, natch.

Ummm, YES. Yes to everything in this room.

I had to stitch this together (likes my skillz? hahahah ohhhh).

Again, YES TO EVERYTHING IN THIS ROOM.

I would live in this movie if I didn't think I'd die in some horrible fashion.

"HISSSSSSS!!!!" That's my wolf spider speak.

Jaya bought me some cheap modeling clay from Target and I DID WORK. Do work? DO WORK! Whatevs, because I got on it and made this:

It's like half spider, half crab, but all kinds of sassy!

Kind of adorable!

But really what I want is this adorable baby:

It's eating! Don't be bummed that a scorpion can kill you. Found image on Google.

All Saints Day... NOOOOOOO!

What's up cable television? Didn't want to play any reasonably scary movies this Halloween weekend? Jaya and I spent most of the weekend talking about and watching terrible movies. Here's a list of the sad, SAD movies we endured this Halloween and All Saints Day (blaaagg... dry heave. you'll see why) holiday: +Halloween (2007 Rob Zombie version): We caught the movie about an 30 minutes in and it wasn't horrible, I guess, but J and I realized we like our killings done with more "passion" and to be a bit more gory. Stabby-stab doesn't do it for me anymore. +The Uninvited: YAAAAAWWWWNNNN fest. We actually watched the entire movie and alls I got to say is, STOP TRYING TO REMAKE ASIAN HORROR FILMS, AMERICA!! Just watch the Korean original, "A Tale of Two Sisters." It gets confusing as shit somewhere towards the end but it's still miles better than facial close-ups of that "Lemony Snickett" girl mouthbreathing. +The Messengers: YAAAAAWWWWNNNN fest pt. II. We watched only 3/4 of the movie and that was more than enough to make me want to slit my wrists. Why, in the year 2006, would anyone, especially a family, hire A DRIFTER? And I totally called out the "Kristen Stewart got drunk and muted her baby brother" plot story five minutes into the opening scene. +Boondock Saints Part II: All Saints Day: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! We didn't watch it but we talked about the first one and the newly released (and "highly anticipated") sequel over lunch and NO THANK YOU JAYA. I'll wait for it to become a "cult success" first, Troy Duffy. +Death Race: J was too angry and tired after all that bad movie watching to stay awake for the only watchable film (save for Halloween 2007- I'll rent and watch the entire movie another time) I saw this weekend. It's got Jason Statham doing what? SURPRISE: Racing cars. I get it and he does it well (not with the emoting, just the whole racing cars deal). An Tyrese Gibson as a possible gay prisoner/racer/friend who DEFACES HIS FACE WITH HASH MARKS? I get it. If I can watch Cannonball, I can watch anything. Count me in. Up next, Suspiria!

All pictures via Google Images