This is Probably Why I Never Babysat. That, And I Don't Like Kids.

So I've been phoning it in on this blog. Okay, so I haven't so much as even picked up the receiver and dialed in a number. So what of it!? Busy, folks, tres busy. (And by busy, I mean I've hunted down, found, and as of tomorrow, moved into a new place.) But who cares? No one will after this poster graces their sweet innocent eyes. BAM.

image via slashfilm.com || read the article here

EYE SHOCK. I know. It's pretty bangin'. This poster is probably with your mother right now and you don't even care. It's got that whole "I've been doing cocaine inside a burning house. What do I do now?" -vibe to it, right?

We're kind of a BIG DEAL (pt. II)

Actually, this one is all me. HOOOOOLLLLLLLLA at that. Back in 2005, I took a screenprinting class where I made tons of posters, stickers, posters, and more posters. Well, my teacher asked if she could use my outline of my building/trees/sun poster in the magazine/booklet that the Arts and Graphic Comm. department puts out every year. I said, "Of course! Go ahead!" I, unfortunately, wasn't able to get a copy of the booklet, so I wasn't able to see how she used my image UNTIL NOW. I'm giving the Internet a voluntary HIGH FIVE! and kudos because some sad sack scanned the ENTIRE MAGAZINE/BOOKLET and placed it online for me to find!! HOOLLLLLAAA x 58380934 Internet. Here it is:

Here is a scan of some of the screenprinted images.

Here is my hand-cut (what WHAT?!) keyline. I know: JEALOUS.

Shout out to "Anonymous"- we work well together.

If you're interested in community college-grade prose, poetry, and prints, here is the entire booklet called InScape in .pdf format.

We're kind of a BIG DEAL (pt. I)

I've done a HORRIBLE thing. I "googled" myself. MYSELF. VOOOMMMMMIIIITTTTTDAFJWOEJFD in my mouth; I know it's self-centered and HORRIBLE but I was tired of stalking all of my past and present (to use that word loosely) friends and classmates. Soooo, I decided to stalk myself and I was pleasantly surprised at what I found. When Jaya and I were 8 years old, our parents threw us a big party at the local park and for some reason the L.A. Times was there to cover a story on "Parks are Perfect Party Playgrounds". Being big-timers like us, we evidently "discussed the pros and cons of turning 8." Here is what we said:

The Tengco twins, though, ignored the noise as well as three wedding parties that gingerly picked their way past the picnic shelter in search of strategic photo spots. Instead, Jacqueline and Katherine--"Jaya" and "Kaya" to friends--kept an eye on the steadily growing pile of gifts and discussed the pros and cons of turning 8.

When she woke up that morning, Kaya said thoughtfully, "I felt the same--like I was 7."

But Jaya noticed a change immediately: "When I woke up, I felt like I was 8. I felt smarter and happier."

I, as usual, gave a terse answer. But Jaya, JAYA, got all kinds of sassy and self-aggrandizing with her "smarter and happier" quip. WITH THAT BEING SAID: Trip down (what is left of my) Memory Lane: It brought back the one memory I have of that party: A classmate WOULD NOT let up on the fact that the "Little Mermaid" entertainer/person who was performing at the party was wearing a watch. He kept on going on about how it was impossible to wear watches under the sea. I believe at one point he said, "You're not a real mermaid." Dr. Twinklettits: Smartass! Pickles, the drummer: Dude, no hitting. Here is the full article. OBLIGATORY PICTURE POST: Jaya and I cheek-to-cheek during our roadtrip up to Big Sur, CA back in May 2008. AWWWWWW! I know!

I LOOVES my bangs here and the foreshadowing of the blonde-ness of Jaya's to come.

The not-Bixby bridge (but just as beautiful).

Message RECEIVED.

Last week, I cracked open a fortune cookie and this is what it told me:

THANK YOU, Natalee Thai Restaurant.

I'M A BELIEVER! I'M A BELIEEEEEEVER!!!

I'm crossing off #s 1 & 2 off of my "Things I Need To DO" list and I'm packing my bags for Stockholm, Sweden!!

Or Helsinki, Finland! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really, whichever one will have me first. BOOM. Done and done. p.s. I should really try playing those numbers in the lottery.

We loves us a gooood "crick".

We just came back from visiting family in Walnut Creek, CA and it was good times, good times. Tons of eating, a little bit o' swimming, and lots and LOTS of horsing around with our young cuz's (aka Baby Hands McFumbles and Soft Hands McGooo).

I's lookin' like a CREEPER creeping up on my cuz, Baby Hands McFumbles.

WHAT I LEARNED FROM THIS TRIP:

• I HAVE GOTS TO STEP UP MY GAME; I can't let a couple of baby hands beat me at Spoons, Slap Jack, and Kerplunk (aka "Marbles").
• Forecast for the future: I might inherited a CACKLING, earth-shattering laugh.
• Kids don't like to be threatened to be left on a sidewalk to wait for their parents to pick them up.

Hirsute Pursuit (pt II).

It's gonna get weird real fast and real soooon because: IT'S CONFESSION TIME. CONFESSION TIME #1: Sometimes, I wish I was a DUDE. For reeeaalllls, people, FOR. REALS. As a lady (Lady Kaya, as I was known backintheday), I have to choose to wear shorts/skirt/pants/jeans with a tanktop/tshirt/buttonup/fancytop with sandals/sneaks/boots/chucks. It gets real hard, real tough, REAL FAST. But if I was a dude, I'd probably rotate the same three shirts, two jeans, and sneaks every three to five days. But most of alllllll, I'D GET A SLAMMMMMIN' HAIRCUT. I'd either go long, dirty rocker hair length, a la Axl Rose in the 80s-90s (so, sans cornrows), or go totally floppy-top, with the sides and back cut short. Hmmmm, yah. So, hopefully in my next lifetime, I'll be reincarnated into a guy with riduculous hair. FINGERS CROSSED.

Ohhhhh my lady instincts won't let me let go of my long hair just yet, but one day... ONE DAY!

--- CONFESSION TIME #2: If I had the balls to cop anyone's style, I'd take Wednesday Addams style please! She mastered the blank, dead-face stare that I ADORE; she has the whole "floral-on-black-with-white-collar" dress market cornered; BUT MOST OF ALLLLL, she gots some zazzzzfied hair. She has shiny-ness and sheen that could blind a baby's eyes! And when it's coupled with the widow-peak and the "five-head" that she sports..... IT'S LIKE WHOA. JEALOUS.

"I'm a homicidal maniac, they look just like everyone else." HOLLLLA at that. Images from HEL LOOKS, Hoy, Stil in Berlin, StockholmStreetStyle, Oslo Stil, & Google Images.

Hirsute Pursuit (pt I).

I have always had BIG plans for my hair. I want it HUGE; I want rolling waves + a 90s perm; I want to be able to wear my hair down during the coldest, rain-iest, and windiest days and be okay with it. But I also want it long enough to braid so I can live out my Wednesday Addams/Swedish milkmaid/Pochantas/Tonto dreams. But what I really need is a trimmy trim trim for my split ends. Wohhh wohhh. The damns internet and its fancy websites have just fueled the fire that I call, "Kaya's Next Hair Dream Checklist" (the title lacks some zazz but the pictures more than make up for it). --- Kaya's Next Hair Dream Checklist: 1. I adore BIG hair when it's to done the 90454094 power (but leaving the hairspary in back in 90s). But I adore it EVEN more when it looks like its been lazily pushed to one side or haphazardly knotted in a high bun.

2. I was born with dark black hair that had hints of purple when the sunlight hit it just right. In my teenage angsty years, I dabbled in the rainbow array of colors ranging from magenta pinks to turquoise blues. Just last year, I dyed my hair the various shades of chocolate brown (milk to bittersweet). But now I have settle on a "intense auburn red," as indicated on side of the L'oreal box. It not quite as vibrant as these ladies, BUT I'M WORKING ON IT. Soooo, QUIT hasslin' me.

Images from HEL LOOKS, Hoy, Stil in Berlin, StockholmStreetStyle, Oslo Stil, & Google Images.

Knee deep in the best crap we can buy.

Jaya and I are on this constant and manic quest to find new and different thrift stores. It's like an addiction that we have to feed and fuel every couple of weeks.

It can be exhausting, frustrating, exciting, or ridonculously MIND-BOTTLING. We can either come away from the experience with some great, if not interesting, goooodies, or just achy feet and smelly, grubby little hands.

However, sometimes amongst all the rubble and rough we find little gems and diamonds that make the hunt and gather alllll worth it (save for the smelly paws: ugggh + grody x 430924809 million). Here are some of the best things we have found in the past few weeks. ENJOY.

I'm getting closer and closer to my "porcelain" (aka REAL) "baby hands" dreams. BABY STUMPS!

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Jaya found this very ADORABLE 45 LP holder. Some of the detailing is lost here, but there's embossings of cats playing flutes, windmills (HOLLA), princes, and rabbits in costumes.

---Mmmmmmmmm, DRAWERS. And yes, I do have enough pink, red, and purple pens to warrant (almost) individual compartments.