As my mom would say, this is what I wore to "debut" my new tattoo at the Rose Bow Flea Market, which (as a side note) sucked balllllls because it combined two of my other greatest hates: people and allergies.
I'm going to try to keep my hate (and the length of my post) to a minimum, because, as my horoscope said the other day, "goodness and positive vibes."
IT'S PICTURE-ME TIME:
David Bowie's Young Americans and Tom Petty's American Girl have been on repeat on my Ipod this summer, hence my 70s preppie republican look.
Ms. Smirky McSmirkison. Smile, FACE, SMILE!
+Clubmaster sunglasses: BleuDame.com.
+Beaded Necklace: Torrance Antique Flea Market (a $3 steal!).
+Blue & cream striped button-up: Salvation Army (another $3 steal!).
+Purse: Torrance Antique Flea Market.
+Coon tail: Indian trading post in Lee Vining, CA.
+Belt: Target.
+Cut-off shorts: jeans turned into cut-offs by ON.
+Oxfords: Rose Bowl Flea Market.
As much as I LOOOOOVE tattoos, I DESPISE getting them.
It combines two of my greatest hates (nooo, noo, not "fears." I, like Chuck Norris, FEAR NOTHING. HAAAAAA.): needles and socially ambiguous/awkward situations.
+I hate foreign, sharp things repeatedly stabbing me (I had to choose my words carefully because there's a baaaad joke in there, somewhere, that I'm not gonna even touch).
+I hate small talk.
+I REALLY hate talk of any kind while getting tattooed.
+I hate looking into the dead faces of people as I try to explain something simple with the rickety hand movements and incomplete sentences (i.e. "I want... A yeah... No, I get it...").
HATES YOUS THINGS.
However, HOWEVER, this past Saturday (small aside: DON'T FORGET, KAYA: 07 AUG 2010 is when you got this tattoo), I had THE MOST PLEASANT TATTOO EXPERIENCE EVER.
When he started tattooing, Tim (aka, the tattoo artist) he asked me, "Sooo, you like Mary Poppins and Julie Andrews?" I mumbled back an answer to the affect of, "I like umbrellas and I wanted this space filled."
Then, THEN, he says, "I loved Mary Poppins as a kid. I thought Julie Andrews was HOT. I hate to say it, but I know that movie BY HEART." BOOOOOOOM. Blew. My. Mind.
Wellll, so now you guys know that I'm a BABY when it comes to getting tattooed, but IT'S PICTURE MONTAGE TIME!!
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Moments before I look away in ANGUISH. And CHECK IT, that's me trying to rip a piece of flesh off my thigh.
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Me, in noticeable pain. The cat poster can't even calm down my fear, I MEAN HATE.
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MY NEW TATTOOOOOO!:
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And to end this most non-heart wrenching, least-awkward social situation, Tim looked down at the finished tattoo and said, "I don't think there's anything more to do. 'It's perfect in every way.'"
WHHHHHAT?! WHHHAAT? He DONE QUOTED Mary Poppins. If, for some godforsaken reason, you find yourself in Temecula, CA and you BE ITCHING for a new tattoo, sssh-check out Tim Forbus and Soul Expressions Tattoo Studio.
**EDIT: CHECK OUT JAYA'S MOST AWESOMELY, PARTY-TASTIC EXPLOSION BEAR TATTOO (aka "An Ode To California, the Majestic"). I love it, love it, love it. As Tim put it sooo nicely, "This bear ready to party like it's 1999... or 2011."
Other stimulating conversation highlights that night:
+Man smoking outside shop:"You know you got a ferret in your bag?" Me: "What? (I thought he said "fairy" which CON-FUSED ME)." Man: "You got a ferret in your bag (then he chuckles)." Me (looking at the coon tail keychain on my purse): "Ohh, hahaha, it's a raccoon [tail]! It jumped in my purse!"
+Me(explaining what I want): "Ohhh, and if you could add 'wind', because, you know..." Tim (finishing my sentence): "...Yah, it's in the movie. But you can't really DRAW wind, because it's not a 'thing', you know. You can't 'see' wind." WOH WOH. Thank you for the meteorology lesson (and for another tattooer saying, "Why not make it look like the Morton Salt wind?").
+Tim: "I had a crush on witches." Me: "You mean Angelica Huston in Witches?!" Tim: "Nooo, no, like Samantha in Bewitched. And, she's not a witch, but Jeannie in I Dream of Jeannie. She was hot."
+Tim: "You don't like looking when I tattoo you. Every time I start, I see you look down." Me: "Ahhh! I don't know!! I hate watching! I can't do it!" Tim: "No, no. I get it. Me, though, if I can't see it, like getting tattooed on my back, it hurts more." Me: "Ehhhh (I continue to look at the cat poster to my left).
+Another tattooer to his client: "Fuck you. Ahh, I'm gonna fuck you." Tim to other tattooer: "I'm gonna fuck you 'til you love me." Hahahaahhahha's all around.
I trying not to be one of those people who's complaining about the mild weather here in L.A., buuuuut, WHAT THE WHAT, am I right?!
Today, it was about 83 degrees with a slight wind... and it's almost August.
Where's the blistering heat?! Where's the melt-your-face-off sun?!
It's 2010- where the fuck is my jet pack and hover board?! Sorry, sorry, I disgress. I get into this thing and... ehhhh, that's another discussion.
Annnnnyway, here's my Summer mixtape! There's not much in the way of new music in this playlist, just some songs you might want to listen to on a lazy summer day.
This mixtape is different for me because it went in this totally 90s "soft rap" route? 90s "soft rap"? Is that a thing? Maybe?? Can you feel the inflection in my voice rising and rising AND RISING with each question I ask? YES? Stop it, Kaya.
Welllll, this has some favorites on here: my fav Tom Petty song, my fav Cranberries song (hellllo, The Babysitter's Club movie, anyone?), my favorite John Fahey song, my favorite Kinks song (shout out to Jaya: we're no longer strangers, my friend), and, as in most of my summertime mixtapes, Led Zeppelin's Going to California (allllways a must). Click on the title to download (only good for 7 days)!
Summer 2010:: Some Summer Day Mixtape:
001/ Summertime: DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince
002/ Animal: Miike Snow
003/ Teen Creeps: No Age
004/ Dreams: The Cranberries
005/ Bitch Look At Me Now (Two Weeks): Childish Gambino
006/ On A Sunday Afternoon: A Lighter Shade of Brown
007/ Roll Another Joint: Tom Petty
008/ Strangers: The Kinks
009/ Feeling Good: Nina Simone
010/ Going to California: Led Zeppelin
011/ The Great Gig In The Sky: Pink Floyd
012/ Feel It All Around: Washed Out
013/ Tightrope: Yeasayer
014/ Some Summer Day: John Fahey
**FEELING MUSIC-Y YET?
This made me laugh and LAUGH AND LAUGH. Eventhough he's on the fast track to ruining my great state of CA, The Governator has a COVER BAND. "WHHHA?" you ask? In this video, the metal band, Austrian Death Machine, basically scream/sings dialogue from his greatest movie, Kindergarten Cop. If you're not into speed metal, skip over to the 0:30 second mark to hear them scream, "YOU THINK IT MIGHT BE/ MIGHT BE A TUMOR. IT'S NOT A TUMOR/ IT'S NOT A TUMOR." Another great line? "IT DOES NOT MATTER WHO MY DADDY IS" (found at the 1:00 minute mark). Annnnother great line? "AND ALL THESE QUESTIONS GIVE ME A HEAD..... ACHE." (at the 2:14 minute mark).
Also, yesterday was the first time I've ever heard a Drake song. Really. Jaya had to email his song, Over, and it ain't bad. I still don't know who you are Drake, but I will figure you out! And with that, here are the other musical gems filling my ears (that couldn't make it on the playlist):
MIMS: This Is Why I'm Hot
Slick Rick & Doug E. Fresh: La Di Da Di
**OBLIGATORY PICTURE POST: Same Difference.
This strangely looks a LOT like what I wore in the last post, which is weird, because I normally dislike wearing sooo much black, especially in hot(ish) weather. This is my version of what Jaya wore, based on this picture from No Futvre.
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More details:
+Lace top: Target.
+Clubmaster sunglasses: bleudame.com.
+Studded belt: my sister's.
+Chambray shorts: Forever 21.
+Suede leather sandals: my sister's, via Nordstrom's Rack.
+Brown purse: Torrance Antique Flea Market?
+Racoon tail: from an Indian outpost in Lee Vining, CA.
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Ohhhh, look at that white hair! Fun fact about meeeee: My first white hair popped up when I was about 12 years old. I don't know much I have now (constant hair coloring), but ONE DAY (shaking fist at sky), I will go Rouge-style (via X-Men)! Gambit, you can call me, "Mon Cherie" anytime.
